It has definitely been a journey since I started that first week. I gave myself some goals I was confident but not certain I could achieve - just run for 20 minutes 5 days a week. It seemed so impossible to squeeze that time into my schedule yet sure enough, I adjusted. I pilled on seemingly impossible mileage goals and again, I adjusted.
Still, I was fighting a very negative inner monologue. I felt slow, out of shape and chunky. I was painfully aware that I was in a desperate physical and mental state and I really struggled to think of anything else but that when I started running! And despite the fact that I was taking the right steps forward, I was impatient and extremely hard on myself.
To deal, I poured myself into studying ways in which to get more healthy. I started counting my calories on livestrong.com - a tool that I highly recommend - which proved a quick and easy method to curb my consumption and be aware of the types of nutrients I was putting in my body. But when my left knee started to bother me around week 3, I really started to freak and mentally, I had turned it into a crushing blow to my progress.
What a drama queen.
Cover via AmazonWhen I cut back on my mileage, I replaced the time with some reading; I purchased Dean Karnazes' Ultramarathon Man on my kindle. His story about how he got into running really spoke to me, as did his thoughtful introverted spirit:Having reflective alone time is essential to my well-being, and I am acutely aware of this fact. I certainly enjoy spending time with others and meeting new folks, but seldom am I able to pass more than a few hours in a group before my senses get overloaded and I begin eyeing the exit.
I am likewise an introvert. And as a very front-facing analyst by profession, it's a no wonder that I crave so desperately some time alone to recharge! It's a struggle at home as well - which is especially rough because the long hours at work often result in feeling too guilty to take time for myself and too tired for some physical activity. Clearly, there's a bad cycle in here.
But this week, I feel like I've really broken through.
I took a lot of the readings to heart. On my runs, I really started focusing on my breath, the motion of my body and living in the moment - I was relishing the time alone and enjoying the sensation of my mind, and body working in concert to get one foot moving in front of the other. I welcomed the 'discomfort' that is par for the course when exercising your heart and muscles and I really feel as though I broken through a mental wall.
To boot, not only have I shed 5 excess pounds in the past 4 weeks, I have markedly more strength and endurance. Below are a few stats and of course pictures from this amazing weekend of running:
Monday: Rest
Tuesday: 4.3 Miles
Wednesday: 2.4 Miles
Thursday: 4.3 Miles
Friday: Rest
Saturday: 11.7 miles - Long Run
Sunday: 3.5 miles - Recovery
Whoever's out there reading this, happy running! : )
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